Have you ever had one of those moments where you're just completely brought down by something? Maybe you were having an excellent day, and then you spilled hot chocolate on your new coat, or you were caught in a sudden downpour with no umbrella and your favorite print was ruined. Even something so simple as being caught without sunscreen on a trip to the beach can just put a total damper on your day- or week, or month (as you suffer with that sunburn or that chocolate stain!). So what can you do to fight it?

1. Buy yourself flowers that match your outfit
2. Have one piece that you absolutely adore, no matter how it fits or looks on you. Maybe it's a dress, or skirt, or headbow, or whatever, but it just makes you feel so amazing to wear it.
3. Buy a box of expensive truffles and a bottle of cheap white wine (/sparkling cider) and take a bubble bath.
4. Surround yourself with people who love you and who will do anything in their power to keep you out of the dumps. You know-the gal pals you can call up any day to make a sucky evening alone into a night of chick flicks or horror movies.
5. Find your "sick food." I have a certain brand of chewy chocolate chip cookies that I always buy when I'm feeling cruddy. I got a really awful cold a few years ago, and all I could drag my frilly rear out of bed for was Dimetapp, cinnamon tea with honey, and this huge bucket of cookies I got from the local supermarket. Now, whenever I'm ill or just feeling less-than-fantastic, those cookies are what I crave, and they always make me feel better about life.
6. Alternatively, learn a recipe for a baked good that you can share with people you love. Giving to others really is a fantastic mood-lifter.
7. Make yourself an "I Rock" folder on your computer. An idea I stole from my favorite business blog for crafty entrepreneurs, this is a folder on your computer that compiles all your best attributes: if I had one, it would be filled with pictures of my favorite coordinates, snapshots from outings with friends, articles that I was really proud of, and photos of my favorite creations for Amaranth Opulent. Maybe if you're an artist you could include your favorite pieces, or your favorite designs if you're a seamstress- whatever it is you do best, put it all into one place to remind yourself how much you rock.
8. Keep room in your budget for a bit of retail therapy every so often. This weekend I bought myself a cute little schedule book from Kinokuniya- it's light blue with a cute pattern on it, lots of space to jot down notes, and even a map of the Tokyo subway system, which I'm certain will prove indispensable this March!
9. Cull the unnecessary. You know what that means to you- the friend who only ever brings you down with her gossip, the slacker boyfriend, your own attempts to live up to others' expectations, or even the clothes you never wear from your wardrobe. Whatever it is that's cluttering up your mind, remove it from your life. Trust me, you'll feel so much freer after.
10. Be spontaneous. Surprise yourself. Do something on a whim that you never thought you would do. I've told the story of my tattoo a few times on here, but it dears repeating because it's the one thing I've done in my life to permanently alter it, and I couldn't be happier.

If you remember, on 12/11 I attended a vintage expo hosted by Brazen Betties Boutique as a vendor for my jewelry line. The event was wonderful! It featured a fashion show of vintage fashions/alterations and a Bettie Page look-a-like contest, and since Kayla and I were right next to the DJ's booth, we got the perfect view of everything!

Our table:

Say, Dolly!

The lovely Kayla:

Amaranth Opulent

A few of the items I sold aren't going to be actually sold at the shop- I wanted to have more things on the table that would appeal to non-lolitas, so I busted out some cute lavender-filled sachets (shaped like cupcakes and acorns) and rose rings.

What I wore:

Some of da Betties! Yep... best seat in the house... I guess not at all times! The Betties lined up right in front of our booth, completely blocking us from view for the 45 minutes or so until they got everything for the show sorted out, and they also seemed to think we were involved in the contest as they kept demanding technical answers from us. Sigh... but a few of them came back afterward to chat and look at our booth, and they were very sweet. Must have been just nerves, I guess!

A few other booths:

All in all, I'd say the vintage expo was great fun and a wonderful experience. Call me up for next year's show!

This post brought to you by Christina's apartment, Photoshop, and a lot of sugar.

On Sunday, 12/19/10,  I organized a potluck holiday crafternoon for the CT lolitas.We all arrived at my lovely ex-roomate Tina's centrally-located apartment for an afternoon of crafts, snacks, and frills. Our spread included salsa burgers, vegetarian chili (made by me!), and a crapload of sweets! I brought a bottle of sparkling apple cider, herb-infused hot apple cider, and eggnog cookies, as well as the veggie chili. There was also cinnamon-bun cookies, spice cakes, and Christmas-themed sugar cookies, as well as a few other treats. I think we ate more than we crafted, but that's kind of par for the course for me...

Group shot:

Above photo, from left: Rebecca, Lindsay, Jesi, me, and Savannah

Random shot of some of the foods:

It was so nice to see girls I haven't seen in a while! Jesi and Lindsay both go to school in Georgia, so we hopped on the chance to see them while they were home for the holidays. We vegged out, knitting, deco-ing, or making jewelry while chatting about TaoBao and our boyfriends' money habits. It was so relaxing, just hanging out with the girls!

Here's what I wore:

Rundown:

• Headbow and OP: BABY, the Stars Shine Bright
• Blouse: Innocent World
• Socks: Betsey Johnson
• Boots: Bodyline

I wanted to go for a vintage-y look, so I put my hair up into some silly curls that reminded me of pin-up hairstyles. Here's a close-up:

Speaking of hair, say goodbye to my lovely colors! I need to return to my desk job over vacation and for some of next semester, so I'm going to have to go back to natural colors. Not sure what I'll do yet- probably a nice, deep auburn. Any suggestions?

So this is one of a few holiday celebrations I've attended this year! Seeing as it's Christmas and all, I figured now would be a good time to wish you....

One of the easiest things to get for someone one doesn't know well is a dessert of some kind. Of course, you should know these people well enough to know if they have allergies or dietary restrictions, maybe their favorite type of flavors, but in my opinion, a small platter or tin of sweets is one of the best ways to say "I'm interested in getting to know you better." Since personally I've met so many new lolitas in the past few weeks, I've been thinking of fun ways I can spread the joy of the holidays with these girls without breaking the budget. So I thought, what better way than homemade treats they can share with their family and friends? And yeah, anyone can just grab a box of brownie mix or make some cupcakes- everyone knows chocolate and cake are two of a lolita's favorite things. But of course, I'm too ~unique~ to resort to such common-place confections, so here are some of my ideas for lovely little treats that are simple to make or find, ultra-loli, and oft-overlooked.

An assortment of truffles: nothing says gourmand like a truffle assortment, homemade or store-bought. For store-bought, I have a fantastic chocolatier that I visit when I need a really beautiful gift, but those things aren't cheap. Another option? Make up a batch of chocolate ganache (I almost feel silly linking to a recipe for it, it's so easy! Switch out the rum for a bit of flavored extract or butter if you avoid alcohol, but it'd really all cook out either way). Let it cool until it's almost the consistency of clay. Take a small ice cream scoop or melon-baller and scoop a few out onto a parchment-lined cookie sheet or plate and roll them in your hands until they're little rustic spheres- think of actual truffles, which are similar to mushrooms and never perfectly rotund. Your hands will heat the chocolate a bit (this is a messy job- wear gloves!); this is okay, though, because it means they'll be wet enough to roll them in something. My favorite is a nice dark cocoa powder, but you could also do finely-chopped nuts, coconut, or sprinkles. This recipe for truffles disguised as cupcakes (picture above) is almost the same idea but a little less elegant, a tad more kitschy, and a great idea for the holidays! No time or effort? You can usually pick up a nice package of truffles at your local gourmet market or even some grocery stores.

Petit Fours: The classier but oft-overlooked cousin to the cupcake. You can buy these at some bakeries, but an easy way to make these teatime staples is to make a sheet cake (make cake batter, pour onto greased & floured sheet pan instead of a cake pan or cupcake tins), then cutting the large cake into small one-inch squares. Thin cakes can be layered two or three tall and frosted (it'd be especially tasty with lemon curd or jam between the layers), or thicker ones can be covered in icing or fondant themselves. I always think these should come in delicate flavors, like lavender or green tea, but a simple chocolate cake mix would be lovely as well.

Think past the macaron for exquisite french desserts. Palmiers are a relatively simple treat for beginner bakers, croissants aren't too hard, and for you pros out there, try dabbling in eclairs, cream puffs, or anything that uses Pâte à Choux. Not only will this be marvelously impressive for your new friends or meetup attendees, but it may be an excellent opportunity to learn and teach something new and fun about another culture, especially one so prominent in lolita as the French.

Not French? No problem! Ethnic holiday cookies such as Pfeffernusse or Chrusciki, of which my mother makes a Hungarian version every year, are great ways to share your culture or try out a new one. Almost every country that celebrates a winter holiday has a traditional cookie recipe- look one up and give it a whirl! Try to put your own spin on it, too- for example, I once had Pfeffernusse that were covered in powdered sugar that had been infused with chai tea, and my mother's version of Chrusciki (which has been handed down through the family and we all only call "Hungarian Cookies") uses a filling of apricot or prune jam, both of which are traditional flavors of the motherland.

Redefine a box of chocolates: Choices for this abound- either go to the store and buy a whole bunch of different candies like jordan almonds and other minis, or try to recreate your favorite childhood memory. Make homemade peanut butter cups, peppermint patties, chocolate-covered strawberries, nuts, or pretzels, cherry cordials, or caramels.  Protip: anything with chocolate will become rich and indulgent with a dash of instant coffee or espresso powder, and caramel goes amazingly with sea salt- fleur de sel if you can manage it!


Sweet treats as holiday gifts are really nothing new- my boyfriend's mother is notorious for making huge platters of Christmas cookies for everyone she knows (seriously, huge- at least two feet across, and usually way bigger! Her kitchen is a designated cookie factory starting this week). It's no surprise- the holidays are a time to show people you care about them, and what a way to show your love for a friend or your eagerness for friendship with a new acquaintance. Honestly, if I had the time, money, and skill to bake or cook all of my holiday gifts, I would be all over it, because I feel like it's such a thoughtful way to show someone you've been thinking of them. These also would make such a sweet contribution to a potluck holiday meetup! Either way, baking and creating comforting foods is so wonderfully suited to the holidays- especially in my area, where we're sometimes lucky if the temperatures get above freezing this time of year; nothing sounds better than spending the day in front of a warm oven or stove, sipping hot chocolate while icing petit fours or stirring ganache into concoctions to brighten the dark, cold winter of those I care about.

Mori-Girl is becoming a bigger and bigger obsession of mine now that the colder months are unarguably upon the Northern Hemisphere. All I want right now is... well, a mug of frothy hot chocolate, but fashion-wise, I would be ecstatic to be covered in furs, knits, and thick wool tights. Many lolitas also wear mori-girl style (in my opinion, because a fashion about comfort is a welcome break from petticoats and corsets), but for those of us who don't, never fear! Here are a few ideas on how to have a very Mori winter:

♥Instead of decorating your door with a wreath, tie some pine boughs together with twine and hang that out instead.

♥If you celebrate Christmas (or even if not!), surprise your family this year by baking a bouche de noel. It's a chocolate rolled cake usually filled with chocolate mousse and decorated like a log, complete with wood grain and often little mushrooms or leaves made out of marzipan or meringue.

♥When I think of the holidays, I think of things that smell delicious and remind me of Christmases past. Buy a wax or oil burner and a scent like pine or cinnamon to scent your whole house all season long.

♥Wear your hair in looped braids, or if that doesn't work, braid pieces of ribbon or twine together and wear them as accoutrements- belts, chokers, or bracelets.

♥Pin some pine in your hair like people do with flowers in the summer. A small twig would be very pretty and smell lovely, but be careful of sap!

♥Speaking of scents, switch out your perfume for something earthy or crisp, scented with musk, amber, or bergamot.

♥Mori-girl is inconic for understated makeup, so instead of pink lip gloss and porcelain-doll blush, try a berry-colored lipstain or lip shimmer, that will hardly even look like makeup - something that will make you look flushed, like you've just come from a snowy sleigh ride.

♥Please, give your numb toes a rest from over-the-top heels! Find yourself a nice pair of tall brown boots lined with faux fur. I got mine at a vintage store in NYC, and I basically live in them as soon as there's the slightest nip in the air.

♥Knit earmuffs are really big this season. I've seen them in plaid, heart-print, and even with huge 3-D roses attached to them! Get some in brown or beige, lined with fleece or faux fur.

♥Take a walk in the woods while reading Robert Frost, a perennial favorite here in New England. If you've never heard of him, he popularized the saying "the road less traveled by" in one of his famous poems. For winter, "Stopping By Woods on a Snowy Evening" is just too perfect.

Just a little note- some of you may have noticed that the layout is being switched up a bit. This is in preparation for a brand-new look to Miss Lumpy, something simpler and cleaner but still lovely and opulent. The main body area is now cream instead of light blue, making the words stand out more and making them more easier to read. The background has also changed- I loved the chandeliers in the last one, but it was just too busy and the colors didn't really match, so I made up this nice gradient one, instead. I might add some stars or something to it at some point, too!

Also, you may notice I've removed my blog roll. This is because I'm trying to clean up my layout, and all of those jumbles of text just look crowded and busy. Instead, to clean it up a bit, I've added the contents of my blogroll to an "Inspiration ; Links I Love" page, which is linked everywhere on my blog by a small banner under the header, along with my other pages. Speaking of, since I've had some people express interest in working with me from a press standpoint, I've added a Press Page. This page includes information on my services as a blogger: reporting at events, advertising, product reviews, as well as information on how to hire me out for photography, modeling, etc. If you'd like any information on these services, please let me know!

Further remodeling will be coming in the form of a very fancy new header (wait til you see what I'm planning!), as well as customizing a few other things in fun ways. Also, thank you so much for over 300 followers and 70,000 views!! And this is only in the nine months I've been on blogger! Thanks guys, I adore you all ♥

I've often said that lolita fashion should be for everyone. I feel that all girls have a princess inside of them waiting to be released, just as we all have Joan of Arcs waiting for something to fight for and Juliets confronted with something worth dying for. Like many lolitas, sometimes when I'm bored in class I sit and imagine dressing up my classmates in frills and petticoats and tiaras, just so they can feel it for themselves once. I'm one of those girls who was elated when brands started making larger sizes, not just for my own purposes, but because it makes this amazing aesthetic so much more accessible to the people who, arguably, may need it most. After graduating high school, I discovered that some of my friends in the class under me were buying their first frills, and instead of feeling replaced or getting hot-headed about having done it first, all I could be was happy to have played any part in introducing lolita to these girls' lives, no matter how small. In conclusion, I'm not one to get territorial over lolita. It's not mine, I don't own it, and therefore I feel no need to keep it all to myself. And anyway, it's kind of silly to try and keep your clothing style to yourself- everyone within a quarter-mile is going to notice a huge, walking cupcake!

But sometimes I feel kind of alone in this. Everyone knows about the cattiness of lolitas, the stereotype that "lolitas are bitches" - I must be mostly meeting the exception to that rule, because a large amount of my lolita friends are even sweeter than I am (though admitted that's not saying much!) It's always seemed to me that lolitas are so harsh on newcomers almost as a form of hazing: if you can prove you can take the heat, you're worth your frills, but if you get offended or hurt, your name will be splattered across the front page of Get Off EGL and maliciously passive-aggressive Secrets will be posted about you. Now, I don't use either of these communities, and I've heard that they're getting much more docile, so maybe this is one of those "Back in MY day..." things; if so, then just assume I am speaking only of the past, commenting on the actions of girls who've grown up or quit the fashion. However, it has always seemed to me that this was almost a way that a newcomer proved she deserved the status of a "lolita;" she was allowed to call herself a lolita only if she could take the ugliness of this fashion as well as the beauty. That's honestly a very poignant sentiment, but what about those girls who can't? They, this argument would have to state, do not deserve any of our beauty. They need to remove their rose-tinted glasses and go back to the grayness of modern life.

Now that doesn't jive with this princess. I'm of this crazy opinion that beauty is beauty, and that it belongs to the whole world, no matter your size or age or ethnicity or religion. That being said, even I get possessive of my lifestyle sometimes. This is my conundrum: I don't think any hopeful should have to pass through some kind of flaming hoop to be considered a follower of this fashion, but on the other hand, one can't just drop everything one day and simply decide to be a lolita. There are even times when I see someone in lolita and I get physically angry; she doesn't deserve this, she doesn't appreciate the beauty she's trying so vainly to emulate. That's the hardest for me, personally; I try my hardest to be non-judgmental in every aspect of my life, especially topics which already garner such hostility as lolita. If I do find myself judging other people, I tell myself that everyone gets exactly what they deserve in life, and if that's a nicer dress or better job than me, so be it. It's normal for people to be jealous or judgmental or territorial over things they love; however, that doesn't mean that these feelings should be indulged, nor does indulging it answer the bigger question.

That question is: why? What good does it do the individual or the group to be so insular? Of course, I'm not saying that people make a conscious effort to be territorial- mostly it's an instinctual way for us to protect what's important to us, and it's not lolita-specific, either. How many times you heard of so-and-so being called a poser because they don't perfectly submit to a certain stereotype? Those who willingly fall under that label make a point to exclude those who don't. Maybe this action is a testament to how much they've given up, e.g. a normal lifestyle, to earn the title of "freak," and anyone who hasn't given that up just doesn't deserve whatever title they're striving for. However, in lolita, while lifestyle-ism is rampant and wholly encouraged (especially by me!), usually, no matter how far into the depths you get, most lolitas do have a non-loli side to them, whether that's the clothes they wear to work or the way they act around their friends. I'm not saying this is bad- quite the contrary! I think it's great- all lolitas have many sides of themselves, just like all people do, so why not express them?

It also means that we're a little more immune to this idea of absolutism: "you're not doing it right" rarely becomes "you're not doing it enough," so while we're definitely more hasty to get territorial than your average Joe, the followers of other subcultures have been known to be even moreso (I'm thinking old school punk or goth here, simply because that's the only other subculture I've ever found myself involved with). Is this to do with the mainstream-ing of lolita fashion? Maybe. Once we're as household of a name as punk, when "cosplay lolita" becomes as common a fashion insult as "mall goth," I wouldn't be surprised if we started getting just as up-in-arms over purism as our alternative fashion predecessors. For now, however, it is important for us to remember that, while territoriality has its place (and I'm not saying we should be all open-arms-y to people who won't understand or appreciate this fashion), but if push comes to shove, I'm certain that she can protect herself just fine without us playing overbearing mothers. Besides- it's not like any of us own this fashion.

I'm proud to announce that Amaranth Opulent will have a booth at the Brazen Betties Vintage Expo and Bettie Page Look Alike contest this Saturday, 12/11. I'll be vending with Pretty Pop Designs, Ophanim Gothique, and Say, Dolly. If you're a fan of vintage cuteness in the Northwest CT area, come check us out!

 The Etiquette of Asking your Significant Other for Brand

The holidays are always such a heartwarming time. Goodwill is in the air as people try to figure out what their loved ones want most this year and, more practically, how to give it to them. This is a particular challenge for those of us in relationship, though it's probably even harder for our lovers. What do you buy the lolita who has everything? More.

Now, before any rallies up with a, "Well, in MY opinion..." I'm not saying that every lolita only wants lolita thing. I was ecstatic when, for my birthday this past May, my boyfriend presented me with a DSi, and of course the perfect gift for someone you love is something that comes from the heart. Since I'm in slightly dire straights this year as far as money goes (due to saving up for Japan on mostly what I can make through my business, since my job is giving me barely enough to life on), everyone in my life is going to be mostly receiving tokens of my love more than anything I think they'll actually... like. Or use. (Sorry, guys.) And I'm sure that any girlfriend, lolita or not, would love to receive a meal from their favorite restaurant, or a freshly-baked batch of her favorite cookies, or a framed photo of herself and her sweetie, as their holiday present this year. That's obvious.

But, of course, these are the holidays, and like I said before, everyone is trying to give each other whatever they want most- so is it wrong to ask for brand? In my opinion, no, it is not. However, it's a sticky situation for a few reasons.

First of all, and this is either going to be common sense to you or totally offensive, but not every relationship is brand-worthy. If you've been dating for two weeks, you probably shouldn't ask for brand; by which I mean, no matter the amount of time you've been dating, if you haven't established the deep, emotional connection that is expected for expensive presents, it's a bad idea. If your lover is not financially independent (has no job), IS financially independent (has to pay all of his/her own bills), or is financially independent but not financially sound (is scarping buy to pay bills/lives off ramen) you might not want to ask for brand - I wouldn't, at least. If he hates lolita (are warning bells going off?), you should really, really not ask for brand.

There, now that you know that you're not going to sabotage your relationship with this question, let's discuss phrasing it. Remember that, no matter how much you've actually told your SO about lolita and brand, there are probably only two things they remember about it: one, that it's expensive, and two, that it's from Japan and therefore even more expensive. Therefore, simply saying "You know what you can buy me for Christmas/Hanukkah/Solstice? BRAND!" will probably do nothing more than put them on edge and guarantee you a refusal.This step calls for tact, timing, and an understanding lover who will wait for you to finish before jumping to conclusions.

I've found that the best solution is to find something you like that's within a sane price point, and present it to them in the following fashion: "Oh, wow, I really love this _______! It's on sale, too, I can't believe it. Were you still looking for a Christmas present for me? If so I'd really like something like this!" The ideas at work in this statement are that you're considering his or her budget, understandingly calling them out for not having bought you anything yet, and being straightforward and respectful about something they probably wouldn't have picked out or been able to find themselves. Sure, you could beat around the bush with something like, "Oh, I wonder if I could ask my parents for it...." or "Oh, I wish I had the money for this right now...." but to be honest, if you're in a mature relationship with another adult, it's much more respectful to just be straightforward. Hopefully, if they don't want to buy it for you (whether it's too much trouble to deal with shipping from Japan, or because they planned to take you out for a night on the town), they'll appreciate your maturity and repay you by being just as straightforward with their answer (tactfully, one hopes). In this instance, it's important to remain this maturity and not throw a temper tantrum, burst into tears, and ask when they stopped loving you.

A little aside: speaking of politeness, it's important to note that, since there are so many second-hand sources available for brand these days, if you can possibly chose something from one of those websites, that would be the most considerate option. Of course, it's your decision, but unless you've been with your sweetie for upwards of a year, brand new pieces as holiday gifts are really a lot to ask of them, in my opinion. I've received brand gifts from lovers before, but I have never asked them for brand new, full-priced items, no matter how long we've been dating (When Stefan and I go to Japan, I might allow him to buy me something brand new if we're both there making the decision together and we both really love it, but even then, only if he offered first... I just feel bad even thinking about asking someone who loves me to spend that much on me). Of course, everyone has different ideas on the topic- I obviously don't know your relationship or any other factors that are at work here, so go with your gut. That's solely my own feelings on the matter.

If you're anything like me, it's always awkward to ask for holiday presents, and even more so if you're asking for something expensive from someone you're in a relationship with. However, remember that you're romantically involved with this individual for a reason; s/he makes you so happy, you couldn't imagine life without them. Make sure you let them know this, no matter what you ask for this year. The beauty and magic of the holidays is being able to give the ones you love things that will enrich their lives, and remember that that is all your partner wants to do for you. As long as you respond in kind and give them a gift that you believe will truly speak to them and enrich them, they will be more than happy to do anything within their means to make you feel the same. Call me a romantic, but I do truly believe that that's the spirit of the holiday season.



(PS- I'm sorry this post is so late! Usually I try to get each week's second post up on Thursday or Friday, but I was just so buys this week!)