Mori-Girl is becoming a bigger and bigger obsession of mine now that the colder months are unarguably upon the Northern Hemisphere. All I want right now is... well, a mug of frothy hot chocolate, but fashion-wise, I would be ecstatic to be covered in furs, knits, and thick wool tights. Many lolitas also wear mori-girl style (in my opinion, because a fashion about comfort is a welcome break from petticoats and corsets), but for those of us who don't, never fear! Here are a few ideas on how to have a very Mori winter:

♥Instead of decorating your door with a wreath, tie some pine boughs together with twine and hang that out instead.

♥If you celebrate Christmas (or even if not!), surprise your family this year by baking a bouche de noel. It's a chocolate rolled cake usually filled with chocolate mousse and decorated like a log, complete with wood grain and often little mushrooms or leaves made out of marzipan or meringue.

♥When I think of the holidays, I think of things that smell delicious and remind me of Christmases past. Buy a wax or oil burner and a scent like pine or cinnamon to scent your whole house all season long.

♥Wear your hair in looped braids, or if that doesn't work, braid pieces of ribbon or twine together and wear them as accoutrements- belts, chokers, or bracelets.

♥Pin some pine in your hair like people do with flowers in the summer. A small twig would be very pretty and smell lovely, but be careful of sap!

♥Speaking of scents, switch out your perfume for something earthy or crisp, scented with musk, amber, or bergamot.

♥Mori-girl is inconic for understated makeup, so instead of pink lip gloss and porcelain-doll blush, try a berry-colored lipstain or lip shimmer, that will hardly even look like makeup - something that will make you look flushed, like you've just come from a snowy sleigh ride.

♥Please, give your numb toes a rest from over-the-top heels! Find yourself a nice pair of tall brown boots lined with faux fur. I got mine at a vintage store in NYC, and I basically live in them as soon as there's the slightest nip in the air.

♥Knit earmuffs are really big this season. I've seen them in plaid, heart-print, and even with huge 3-D roses attached to them! Get some in brown or beige, lined with fleece or faux fur.

♥Take a walk in the woods while reading Robert Frost, a perennial favorite here in New England. If you've never heard of him, he popularized the saying "the road less traveled by" in one of his famous poems. For winter, "Stopping By Woods on a Snowy Evening" is just too perfect.

Just a little note- some of you may have noticed that the layout is being switched up a bit. This is in preparation for a brand-new look to Miss Lumpy, something simpler and cleaner but still lovely and opulent. The main body area is now cream instead of light blue, making the words stand out more and making them more easier to read. The background has also changed- I loved the chandeliers in the last one, but it was just too busy and the colors didn't really match, so I made up this nice gradient one, instead. I might add some stars or something to it at some point, too!

Also, you may notice I've removed my blog roll. This is because I'm trying to clean up my layout, and all of those jumbles of text just look crowded and busy. Instead, to clean it up a bit, I've added the contents of my blogroll to an "Inspiration ; Links I Love" page, which is linked everywhere on my blog by a small banner under the header, along with my other pages. Speaking of, since I've had some people express interest in working with me from a press standpoint, I've added a Press Page. This page includes information on my services as a blogger: reporting at events, advertising, product reviews, as well as information on how to hire me out for photography, modeling, etc. If you'd like any information on these services, please let me know!

Further remodeling will be coming in the form of a very fancy new header (wait til you see what I'm planning!), as well as customizing a few other things in fun ways. Also, thank you so much for over 300 followers and 70,000 views!! And this is only in the nine months I've been on blogger! Thanks guys, I adore you all ♥

I've often said that lolita fashion should be for everyone. I feel that all girls have a princess inside of them waiting to be released, just as we all have Joan of Arcs waiting for something to fight for and Juliets confronted with something worth dying for. Like many lolitas, sometimes when I'm bored in class I sit and imagine dressing up my classmates in frills and petticoats and tiaras, just so they can feel it for themselves once. I'm one of those girls who was elated when brands started making larger sizes, not just for my own purposes, but because it makes this amazing aesthetic so much more accessible to the people who, arguably, may need it most. After graduating high school, I discovered that some of my friends in the class under me were buying their first frills, and instead of feeling replaced or getting hot-headed about having done it first, all I could be was happy to have played any part in introducing lolita to these girls' lives, no matter how small. In conclusion, I'm not one to get territorial over lolita. It's not mine, I don't own it, and therefore I feel no need to keep it all to myself. And anyway, it's kind of silly to try and keep your clothing style to yourself- everyone within a quarter-mile is going to notice a huge, walking cupcake!

But sometimes I feel kind of alone in this. Everyone knows about the cattiness of lolitas, the stereotype that "lolitas are bitches" - I must be mostly meeting the exception to that rule, because a large amount of my lolita friends are even sweeter than I am (though admitted that's not saying much!) It's always seemed to me that lolitas are so harsh on newcomers almost as a form of hazing: if you can prove you can take the heat, you're worth your frills, but if you get offended or hurt, your name will be splattered across the front page of Get Off EGL and maliciously passive-aggressive Secrets will be posted about you. Now, I don't use either of these communities, and I've heard that they're getting much more docile, so maybe this is one of those "Back in MY day..." things; if so, then just assume I am speaking only of the past, commenting on the actions of girls who've grown up or quit the fashion. However, it has always seemed to me that this was almost a way that a newcomer proved she deserved the status of a "lolita;" she was allowed to call herself a lolita only if she could take the ugliness of this fashion as well as the beauty. That's honestly a very poignant sentiment, but what about those girls who can't? They, this argument would have to state, do not deserve any of our beauty. They need to remove their rose-tinted glasses and go back to the grayness of modern life.

Now that doesn't jive with this princess. I'm of this crazy opinion that beauty is beauty, and that it belongs to the whole world, no matter your size or age or ethnicity or religion. That being said, even I get possessive of my lifestyle sometimes. This is my conundrum: I don't think any hopeful should have to pass through some kind of flaming hoop to be considered a follower of this fashion, but on the other hand, one can't just drop everything one day and simply decide to be a lolita. There are even times when I see someone in lolita and I get physically angry; she doesn't deserve this, she doesn't appreciate the beauty she's trying so vainly to emulate. That's the hardest for me, personally; I try my hardest to be non-judgmental in every aspect of my life, especially topics which already garner such hostility as lolita. If I do find myself judging other people, I tell myself that everyone gets exactly what they deserve in life, and if that's a nicer dress or better job than me, so be it. It's normal for people to be jealous or judgmental or territorial over things they love; however, that doesn't mean that these feelings should be indulged, nor does indulging it answer the bigger question.

That question is: why? What good does it do the individual or the group to be so insular? Of course, I'm not saying that people make a conscious effort to be territorial- mostly it's an instinctual way for us to protect what's important to us, and it's not lolita-specific, either. How many times you heard of so-and-so being called a poser because they don't perfectly submit to a certain stereotype? Those who willingly fall under that label make a point to exclude those who don't. Maybe this action is a testament to how much they've given up, e.g. a normal lifestyle, to earn the title of "freak," and anyone who hasn't given that up just doesn't deserve whatever title they're striving for. However, in lolita, while lifestyle-ism is rampant and wholly encouraged (especially by me!), usually, no matter how far into the depths you get, most lolitas do have a non-loli side to them, whether that's the clothes they wear to work or the way they act around their friends. I'm not saying this is bad- quite the contrary! I think it's great- all lolitas have many sides of themselves, just like all people do, so why not express them?

It also means that we're a little more immune to this idea of absolutism: "you're not doing it right" rarely becomes "you're not doing it enough," so while we're definitely more hasty to get territorial than your average Joe, the followers of other subcultures have been known to be even moreso (I'm thinking old school punk or goth here, simply because that's the only other subculture I've ever found myself involved with). Is this to do with the mainstream-ing of lolita fashion? Maybe. Once we're as household of a name as punk, when "cosplay lolita" becomes as common a fashion insult as "mall goth," I wouldn't be surprised if we started getting just as up-in-arms over purism as our alternative fashion predecessors. For now, however, it is important for us to remember that, while territoriality has its place (and I'm not saying we should be all open-arms-y to people who won't understand or appreciate this fashion), but if push comes to shove, I'm certain that she can protect herself just fine without us playing overbearing mothers. Besides- it's not like any of us own this fashion.

I'm proud to announce that Amaranth Opulent will have a booth at the Brazen Betties Vintage Expo and Bettie Page Look Alike contest this Saturday, 12/11. I'll be vending with Pretty Pop Designs, Ophanim Gothique, and Say, Dolly. If you're a fan of vintage cuteness in the Northwest CT area, come check us out!

 The Etiquette of Asking your Significant Other for Brand

The holidays are always such a heartwarming time. Goodwill is in the air as people try to figure out what their loved ones want most this year and, more practically, how to give it to them. This is a particular challenge for those of us in relationship, though it's probably even harder for our lovers. What do you buy the lolita who has everything? More.

Now, before any rallies up with a, "Well, in MY opinion..." I'm not saying that every lolita only wants lolita thing. I was ecstatic when, for my birthday this past May, my boyfriend presented me with a DSi, and of course the perfect gift for someone you love is something that comes from the heart. Since I'm in slightly dire straights this year as far as money goes (due to saving up for Japan on mostly what I can make through my business, since my job is giving me barely enough to life on), everyone in my life is going to be mostly receiving tokens of my love more than anything I think they'll actually... like. Or use. (Sorry, guys.) And I'm sure that any girlfriend, lolita or not, would love to receive a meal from their favorite restaurant, or a freshly-baked batch of her favorite cookies, or a framed photo of herself and her sweetie, as their holiday present this year. That's obvious.

But, of course, these are the holidays, and like I said before, everyone is trying to give each other whatever they want most- so is it wrong to ask for brand? In my opinion, no, it is not. However, it's a sticky situation for a few reasons.

First of all, and this is either going to be common sense to you or totally offensive, but not every relationship is brand-worthy. If you've been dating for two weeks, you probably shouldn't ask for brand; by which I mean, no matter the amount of time you've been dating, if you haven't established the deep, emotional connection that is expected for expensive presents, it's a bad idea. If your lover is not financially independent (has no job), IS financially independent (has to pay all of his/her own bills), or is financially independent but not financially sound (is scarping buy to pay bills/lives off ramen) you might not want to ask for brand - I wouldn't, at least. If he hates lolita (are warning bells going off?), you should really, really not ask for brand.

There, now that you know that you're not going to sabotage your relationship with this question, let's discuss phrasing it. Remember that, no matter how much you've actually told your SO about lolita and brand, there are probably only two things they remember about it: one, that it's expensive, and two, that it's from Japan and therefore even more expensive. Therefore, simply saying "You know what you can buy me for Christmas/Hanukkah/Solstice? BRAND!" will probably do nothing more than put them on edge and guarantee you a refusal.This step calls for tact, timing, and an understanding lover who will wait for you to finish before jumping to conclusions.

I've found that the best solution is to find something you like that's within a sane price point, and present it to them in the following fashion: "Oh, wow, I really love this _______! It's on sale, too, I can't believe it. Were you still looking for a Christmas present for me? If so I'd really like something like this!" The ideas at work in this statement are that you're considering his or her budget, understandingly calling them out for not having bought you anything yet, and being straightforward and respectful about something they probably wouldn't have picked out or been able to find themselves. Sure, you could beat around the bush with something like, "Oh, I wonder if I could ask my parents for it...." or "Oh, I wish I had the money for this right now...." but to be honest, if you're in a mature relationship with another adult, it's much more respectful to just be straightforward. Hopefully, if they don't want to buy it for you (whether it's too much trouble to deal with shipping from Japan, or because they planned to take you out for a night on the town), they'll appreciate your maturity and repay you by being just as straightforward with their answer (tactfully, one hopes). In this instance, it's important to remain this maturity and not throw a temper tantrum, burst into tears, and ask when they stopped loving you.

A little aside: speaking of politeness, it's important to note that, since there are so many second-hand sources available for brand these days, if you can possibly chose something from one of those websites, that would be the most considerate option. Of course, it's your decision, but unless you've been with your sweetie for upwards of a year, brand new pieces as holiday gifts are really a lot to ask of them, in my opinion. I've received brand gifts from lovers before, but I have never asked them for brand new, full-priced items, no matter how long we've been dating (When Stefan and I go to Japan, I might allow him to buy me something brand new if we're both there making the decision together and we both really love it, but even then, only if he offered first... I just feel bad even thinking about asking someone who loves me to spend that much on me). Of course, everyone has different ideas on the topic- I obviously don't know your relationship or any other factors that are at work here, so go with your gut. That's solely my own feelings on the matter.

If you're anything like me, it's always awkward to ask for holiday presents, and even more so if you're asking for something expensive from someone you're in a relationship with. However, remember that you're romantically involved with this individual for a reason; s/he makes you so happy, you couldn't imagine life without them. Make sure you let them know this, no matter what you ask for this year. The beauty and magic of the holidays is being able to give the ones you love things that will enrich their lives, and remember that that is all your partner wants to do for you. As long as you respond in kind and give them a gift that you believe will truly speak to them and enrich them, they will be more than happy to do anything within their means to make you feel the same. Call me a romantic, but I do truly believe that that's the spirit of the holiday season.



(PS- I'm sorry this post is so late! Usually I try to get each week's second post up on Thursday or Friday, but I was just so buys this week!)