You know what? I'm just going to say it. I like the rules. I like following rules; they give structure and order and define us as a subculture. Now, I'm not saying that I don't occasionally wear a dress without a petticoat, or I never leave the house with bare legs or a bare head, but if I do, I'm much less likely to call my coordinate "lolita," because it just does not fit the rules of that fashion. It's like if a punk went out in a yellow polo shirt and jeans with his piercings and tattoos and dyed hair. Does it look bad? No, probably not. However, is it punk? Not by any stretch of the imagination.

And that's okay. There's nothing wrong with not fitting your little stereotyped mold perfectly, and I think that's something we should strive to do because it's our job to break stereotypes. However, if you do break stereotypes, know that it may not conform to that label anymore - and personally, I think that's awesome. Be a fashion pioneer! Wear whatever you feel like, but know that it might not be lolita. If you're breaking the rules, it probably isn't.

That's not to say that innovation is "against the rules." Take this outfit by Kelsey of I Do Declare:
It's beautiful. It's innovative. It's everything lolita should be this summer, in my opinion, and it still follows all the rules. See? The Rules shouldn't be viewed as something constricting or stifling of your sartorial creativity but rather as enhancing it, providing a framework that challenges your creativity to work within it. And again, there's nothing wrong with breaking the rules. Sometimes you can only make a coordinate work if you forgo socks, or if you wear a highly-styled wig instead of a hairpiece. However, it's important to know where that line is, when it can be crossed, and when it needs to stay a boundary.

On CNN, Donald Trump just told me the reason I'm angry about Miss America contestants being shot in an uncompromising photoshoot is that I'm jealous. Now, as a woman, I am obviously livid. However, as a lolita, I am even more angry; excuse you, Donald Trump? I'm jealous?! Yes, sir. That's why I'm pissed that these brilliant, self-possessed women who are engineers and have careers that they worked hard for are being told that actually, you can't have any power in my world unless you take off your clothes.

Now, I find that interesting. As a lolita, I never feel more empowered than when I'm completely dressed, completely done-up, and looking entirely unreal (I've heard gyarus say that they only feel comfortable when they're entirely artificial). I find it hard to believe that there are women who feel like showing off their bodies is what gives them power, when it's the exact opposite for me. Who is right? Is it better to remove all layers of artifice and show your true, uncovered self to gain power from anyone who sees you, or to shut that side of you off from the world and empower yourself only by your own standards? Is it better to be a whore or a freak?

Personally, I'd rather be a freak. I'd rather know that I look beautiful for me, by my standards, even if those aren't the rest of America's (or any other country, for that manner). I don't wish I looked like those women. I love my body, but it's mine. My body is mine for me to treasure and to share whomever I see fit. Maybe someday I'd be interested in showing it to other people, but even if I did, it wouldn't be like that.

I also don't find it wrong to pose for photos in various stages of undress. I don't even feel it's wrong for women to do it lounging on beds in stilettos giving either Marilyn Monroe-smiles or smoldering come-hither looks. That's fine. There's art to that, if it's done right. However, I find that promoting a pageant that already comes under scorn in the minds of feminists in this way is not the best thing for their company or, more importantly, their viewers. I heard a higher-up in the company saying that if you go to their website, you'll see that some of the women are engineers or some of them are x or y, but guess what, Miss Universe Organization? The six-year-old girl who's watching the pageant with her family isn't seeing that. The young men who see advertisements on the subway or in magazines or wherever they're going to promote using these images don't know that, either; all they're seeing is yet another woman being objectified in her panties on a bed. I think that Miss USA could be an empowering powwow of feminine energy if it tried to be- I think it could set an amazing example if, in commercials, they showed these women doing this photo shoot, then get up, get dressed, and say "I do this because my body empowers me. You know what else empowers me? My career as an engineer." Also, I keep using the example of the engineer because I'm on the website now and can't find any information about these women outside of the bedroom. You go their their page and it's just a huge picture like the one above, with a quick bio of their name, age, and state, and then a link to buy their photos. Good job, Miss Universe Organization. Not only are you objectifying these brilliant women, you're keeping their accomplishments secret and making money off of them as well. Five stars and a thumbs up for you!

Good gracious, I am so glad I have alternative beauty standards. Otherwise, if I say these photos and actually CARED that society expected me to be like that, I'd probably be in the bathroom vomiting my breakfast up right now. Thanks America! As always, you're a peach!

Here's what I wore for a double-date picnic on Monday with Kayla and our boys! My boyfriend bought me the hairbow when we went to a festival on Mother's Day so I wanted to design an outfit that would match it ♥ I adore my overdress from IDD, and I've been trying to think of some other ways to coordinate it, so when I realized that it matched the bow perfectly, I threw it on over the blouse and jumperskirt I was already wearing. I think I'm going to wear this for my birthday party, too. I love the Wonderland feel to these pictures - the shed from my backyard reminds me of the Rabbit's house if Alice had grown big outside of it instead of inside!
Unfortunately my curls ended up falling by the time I got to my boyfriend's house, so I just ended up doing a flip instead.
Rundown:

• JSK: Bodyline
• Blouse: H&M
• Overdress: I Do Declare custom commission
• Socks: Secret Shop
• Shoes: Offbrand

We went to a lovely field surrounded by woodlands for the picnic and ate lunch in the shade of a long-deceased rich woman's summer cottage. She had donated the house and acres and acres of the surrounding property to the town, and now they do tours of it and have butterfly gardens and woodland trails through the rest of it.

Also, guess what? Today is my birthday! :)

Not gonna lie, Martha is, like, my ultimate girlcrush. I had been familiar with her from the New York City lolita scene, but didn't really talk to her until Otakon of last year. Even then we didn't hang out until later that summer, when Victoria Suzanne and I met up with her and Kelsey in San Francisco. It was upon gallivanting through an unknown city with the pair that Victoria &I really got to know them, as well as getting an amazing first-hand look at both of their very inspirational personal styles. Since I've been (no-so-)secretly girlcrushing on her like mad, I figured she would make a perfect addition to my Get That Style series!

Name: Martha
Zodiac sign: Sagittarius
Location: New Jersey, USA
Style: Classic lolita influenced by historical fashion, mori-girl, and sweet lolita
Definitive trends: Like many lolitas, Martha's most recognizable fashion statement is definitely her hair. Her short bangs and full, huge ringlets make her look much more like an illustration than someone you'd expect to see walking down the streets of New York City. Another recurring look is the creative use of off- or indies-brand items. Like me she adores the work of our mutual friend Kelsey of I Do Declare, as well as Japanese indies brands like MILK and Pink House. This girl also works wonders at chain stores, coming away with gorgeous blouses and cardigans on a frequent basis. Martha's style is all about accentuating the natural and taking classic stand-bys and updating them.Stand-by pieces: Tights or bare legs are favored instead of knee-high socks, and shoes are understated with a vintage flair, especially calf-high boots. Martha is well-known for creative bags, especially favoring pochettes in natural neutrals like brown leather and black fur. She also prefers longer styles, with dresses and skirts falling somewhere between the top of the knee to the calf. Never without a fabulous hair accessory, she mostly favors floral corsages, especially with bows, and feathered hats. Tops are usually cutsews, blouses, or sweaters from chain stores - as I said above, Martha is iconic in my mind for crazy-awesome finds at Forever 21 or even K-mart.

To achieve: RATS! Make or buy a rat for your hair to give it extra volume, then curl it into sumptuous ringlets with either an iron or curlers. Hair accessories should be perched jauntily on one side of the head. Either invest in an amazing hat, or make yourself a few rose combs to fix just above your ear. Include accessories with a glamorously natural vibe, such as a leather purse, feathers in your hair, and pearl jewelry. Interesting necklaces, especially hand-made, are utterly necessary to get her look. For make-up, go with a natural look, coral lips and cream shadow with very little blush (the focus is on her even, porcelain skintone), and manicured brows are a must. Favor prints in bold neutrals, such as stark black-and-white or intricate patterns in cream and brown.

In summary: Natural, natural, natural. If I could describe Martha's style in one phrase, it would be "understated, old-world elegance with a modern flair." For more, check out her new blog, moss garden!

Pink? Polka dots? Hearts? You know what that means - I've roped Victoria into another one of my hair-brained schemes for the benefit of my lovely readers. "Hair-brained" is certainly applicable this time, because here's a hair-spiration post featuring this season's hottest style: Braids! From mainstream to mori-girls, everyone has decided that the braid is back. I've always adored braids as a cute, simple way to jazz up any style, especially in summer when you don't want all that humidity melting your hairspray away. Since my hair is so dark, details don't photograph on it well, so I recruited Victoria to help me out (she sat complacently on her cellphone, figuring out how to link it to her e-mail). Here are some of my favorite braided looks for lolita:

The Crown Braid: An old favorite of mine, it's a touch tricky and takes some getting used to, but if you can master it, the affect is understated but very glamorous. Just take a small section of hair from just above the ear, and start braiding as close to the root as possible. If you can, hold the hair over your head while you're braiding, as this will cut out any lumps that may form when you lay it over the crown. Then... lay it over your crown. Here I secured Victoria's braid with a bobby pin that matched her hair under about three fingers worth of hair behind her ear. If you want, you can adorn the end of the braid with a bow or flower corsage, but here I didn't think it would be necessary, especially with how cute it is to have the pink braid over the blonde hair. A pearl headband behind the braid would be very classy as well.

Crown Corsage Braid: Ahh, so you've mastered the crown braid, eh? Well, here's the level-up. Instead of a regular braid that you pull over the top of the head, take a small section and french braid it across, behind your bangs if you have them. Once you get to the end, curl the tips of your hair around a finger, then keep rolling until you have a rose-like corsage. Secure with a few bobby pins. I can't claim credit for this look - I found it off Youtube tutorial. I can't find it now, but if anyone is interested I'm sure I could dig around for it!


Pigtails With Pizazz: And here is my favorite braided style- sick of normal braided pigtails? take a medium-sized section from the crown at the front of your part and braid it - when I do it on myself I can just do a regular braid, but for some reason Victoria's hair wasn't taking it, so I did a french braid itself. I think this looks much more streamlined than my usual style, but I definitely wouldn't have the patience to do that on my own hair! Maybe if I'm styling someone else's, though. Adorn the ends with anything you would use on normal pigtails, or for added cuteness channel mori-girl and stick some small wildflowers or feathers straight into the braid itself.