Few of you know this, but lately, in addition to lolita I've been really interested in modern mainstream &high fashion. I've been watching the shows, reading the magazines, observing the trends every chance possible, &let me tell you I am loving it! This season is going to be amazing &I am adoring it. Part of my observing has been trying to see what current trends I can combine with lolita, &let me tell you, I'm brimming with ideas. Sure, the stiletto peep-toe booties I've been seeing around don't exactly fit the bill, but let me show you some that do:

Another trend I've noticed, more this fall than so far this winter, is bright, fearless red lips. I personally love the timeless look of red lipstick, but I think it's far too overpowering for me or, in my opinion, most forms of lolita (I have seen it done well, though, especially in gothic). Then I started thinking, what about if it's a Clara Bow? The Clara Bow was popular in the 20's, when tube lipstick was a new-fangled invention that allowed the girls more freedom with its application. It is applied by paling out the lips with primer and/or foundation and redrawing them in smaller &fuller- a good tutorial is here for anyone interested. The reason I think this works well with lolita is that the smaller lip is less overbearing, but is still full &cutely pouty &suits the doll-like look of classic or maybe even sweet... but don't get crazy. The Clara Bow can also be overpowering if it's accentuated too much, so keep it simple!

The last trend I want to address, &one of my personal favorites, plays with color palettes. Use a neutral like black, white, or gray, and pair it with a few pops of a bright color. I used black with pink for this example, but some others are brown with powder blue, grey with lavender, and white with sage green. Note that my examples are muted pastels, but you could potentially do something like red or hot pink if you have the right stuff. Caution - too bright colors can look kind of 80's revival. ~Fashion~ (who?) says that in order for a color to be incorporated into an outfit, you should have three+ pieces of that color as well as your base, so a "pop" would be only one or two small pieces or accessories- a hairbow, socks, or purse, for example. This is, as I said, my favorite current fashion trend &totally defines my non-lolita style - I am SUCH a sucker for neutrals this season! Last year I avoided them whenever possible, but this year I am relishing them - right now I'm wearing solely black &grey as we (type?) speak &it is delicious!

You know I will never tell you to dress like the rest of the world, readers. I adore your individuality &support sartorial experimentation in all its forms, but I also think it's important to look unexpected places for fashion inspiration, and you never know - that place could just be the latest issue of Vogue or Allure!

What are your favorite mainstream fashion trends right now? Do you incorporate them into lolita?

(also, apologies that I've been so sparse lately - I've had a lot of stuff on my plate, not least of which being my first legit University finals. Semester's almost over, though, so soon I will be out of excuses &will go back to updating twice a week or so!)

totally unrelated but really gorgeous picture from weheartit.com

Lolitas are really given an amazing opportunity these days, what with the internet being as commonplace as it is. Newbies as well as seasoned veterans trying a different style can post pictures of themselves on internet communities ranging in audience and, well, severity (for lack of a better word) to get feedback and tips on how to improve their outfits. That's awesome - it's something that previous eras of fashionistas wouldn't have even dreamt of. With the simplest google search, I can see what's going on in the sartorial scene of any city in the world - Tokyo, Amsterdam, New York City.

However, with this new power we also, as always, receive great responsibility. This responsiblity we call "constructive criticism." The new global nature of all internet fashion communities, especially in the lolita scene, means that politeness is key in maintaining fair international relations - by which I mean don't be a bitch. I haven't seen many problems with this in lolita, to be honest, but let's just think of this post as preventative, okay?

How to Criticize Constructively

First, let's define: Constructive Criticism is, by my own definition, an answer to the question, "what can be done differently next time to better achieve the result you want?" Constructive criticism is well-meaning and graceful; no "YOU'RE UGLY &STUPID &GROSS" here.

Giving constructive criticism

• Start and end with the positives - this is a tip I learned way back in English class in middle school. It makes a frame of good that softens any negative blow, &generally comes off more well-mannered than ranting about the negatives of the subject (in this case, a daily outfit or coordinate) &throwing in a half-assed compliment at the end. Starting out positively will also give the subject a confidence boost &make them want to listen to what you have to say.
• Be polite - a good way to do this is with "I" statements- "I'm not a fan of the socks with that skirt," or "I think pink would go better with your complexion than blue." "You" statements sound accusatory - "You should wear pink instead of blue cause it'd look better," or "You shouldn't wear OTK socks because it makes your thighs look huuuuge!!" Of course, these are very extreme examples,but the idea is still true. "I" statements are opinions, while "you" statements are judgements, or at least that's how most people feel (or so I have read!)
• Embellishments like emoticons or exclamation points should be used to make positive statements stand out more - again, they can look accusatory or angry when paired with negative statements.

Accepting constructive criticism gracefully

• Always be greatful for the opinion, even if you disagree - if you didn't want them, you shouldn't have posted to a public forum! (Personal fashion blogs I consider a different story - something posted to your friends page via daily_lolita can be hard to ignore, but on an entirely different website that readers have to go out of their way to look at, post whatever you want. Go crazy. in b4: this is not my personal fashion blog.)
• Listen to the suggestions you receive - somethings you don't notice things that other people do. Sure, you adore your new Innocent World blouse, but maybe you don't realize that the buttons gap a bit at the bust - listen to that person telling you it might look better with a JSK than a skirt!
• Don't get offended! Except in extreme cases such as cyberbullying, usually your critics just mean the best &aren't trying to hurt your feelings, no matter how crass they may phrase it.
• In summary: Listen, smile &nod, consider their suggestions but don't try to please everyone- remember, this is your own personal fashion statement, &you should only be wearing things that make you happy. If you receive too much negetive feedback to the point where you don't want to wear what makes you happy anymore, maybe you should stop posting photos on those communities or forums - I will never tell you to stop wearing things you like! However, as I've said before, respect yourself - if you know posting pictures at a certain website will get you nothing but flack, find somewhere else to share - like I said above, a personal fashion blog is great for this purpose. I started one a while ago for my non-lolita fashion, and even though I don't update it nearly as often as I update here, it's a nice change from articles &outfits that are so compartmentalized as they are in lolita - for anyone who's curious, it's here: trespass.urged - can't believe I never linked to that here before! I'm probably secretly ashamed of how neglected it is.

Now that I've waxed poetic on the joys of blogging and completely deviated from my original topic, I'll leave you with a summary to remind you of what i was actually supposed to be talking about: don't be offended, and don't offend. Play nice with others. Treat others as you'd like to be treated - all that jazz. Do it for karma, if you have to justify it somehow. Just do it.

image from weheartit.com

They're pretty common in lolita. Perfect make-up is almost a necessity, and eyeliner & mascara will do wonders to your eyes, but sometimes there's just one final, absolutely necessary step. Is it the rhinestones at the corners of her eyes? Is it the glitter shadow, or the perfectly-manicured brow? All are great ways to add to your look, but there's one last thing, and despite the fact that they're sometimes glaringly obvious when worn, it is by far one of the best ways to make your eyes look doll-wide, and no, I'm not talking about circle lenses. If a butterfly flapping its wings causes a hurricane by the time it travels around the globe, you'd hate to think what one wink from these babies could do.

Yes, today we're going to talk about false lashes. They might be intimidating, but if you find the right style &apply them correctly they can be SO worth it. They will make your eyes stand out more and look wider &brighter, making you look more awake - like you have big porcelain doll eyes. First, let's talk about styles (examples from Shu Uemura):

• Natural Lashes. These are usually black or brown and made to just enhance your natural eyes. Usually they're the same length as natural lashes or only a little longer and slightly thicker. These are good for daily dressups and non-lolita wear - they'll enhance but they won't POP like "fancy" ones will.
• Individual Lashes. These are individual clumps of a few lashes each that you place manually wherever you need. Directions for use here - I have never used them myself, but they seem to be an interesting idea &something I'd like to try in the future.
• "Fancy" Lashes. These are the lashes favored by most lolitas, in my experience. They are big &dramatic &impossible to ignore. They come in hundreds of styles, from feathered to jewelled to glittery to colored to lace to... basically, if you name it you can find it. My favorites that I've worn myself are these with little pearls stuck THROUGH the lashes. Unfortunately I left them at my parents house and found them "mysteriously" cut to pieces with all the pearls pulled off. I think I know who the culprits are...

These are the main styles - obviously, within each there are hundreds &hundreds of variations, so shop around. Speaking of, where can you buy them? If you're interested in lashes for everyday wear, I recommend going to a high-end cosmetics store like MAC or Sephora and getting a really nice, natural-looking pair. However, for the crazier once-in-a-while styles, I've had amazing luck with Halloween and costume stores like Party City. If it's out of season or you live in a country or area where Halloween isn't celebrated (poor thing!), you can find them online as well. My Diva's Closet is very popular and has a great selection, but I've never ordered from them myself. Another thing to think about is adhesive. Many companies include a small sample tube with their lashes, but not always - check the packaging to make sure. There are also self-adhesive lashes - I don't love them, but they work for some people &are good for beginners who don't wnat to have to worry about glue drying. I'd like to point out that most adhesive contains latex, to which many people (including myself) are allergic. I found latex-free adhesive at my local beauty store but I'm nervous to try it out because of the horror stories I've heard about it: I remember hearing about a lolita who wore used a supposedly "latex-free" adhesive, only to wake up the next day with her eyes swollen shut because it wasn't exactly as hypo-allergetic as the packaging made it out to be. My reaction isn't terrible, but it was only recently that I realized that my eyes aren't supposed to itch &sting the entire time I'm wearing my falsies, so pretty soon I'll probably bite the bullet and try the latex-free stuff soon.

Okay, so you have your lashes: now, let's apply. There are many companies that make eyelash applicators, but they kind of scare me - curlers are intimidating enough! Make-up is not supposed to need machines! I just apply them myself, by hand, the old-fashioned way. Everyone has their own method, but here's what I do:

• Apply all other make-up except mascara first - your primer, shadow, liner, etc.
• Before applying glue, take your lashes and put them against your lashline to make sure they're the right length- trim if necessary from the inside corner.
• Apply a thin line of glue on the lash band.
• Wait a few seconds to give glue time to "set". Once it becomes tacky, you can begin applying.
• Start at the outer corner and lay the lash on your eyelid as close to the lash line as possible. Press it into place &scootch it down a little further to ensure it stays as low as possible. Continue in the same manner with the center and inner corner, then repeat the whole process on the other eye.
• Apply mascara (black, brown, or clear for funky colors). If you want, you can apply some liquid liner over the band, but I've never found it necessary. Curl lightly with an eyelash curler so your natural lashes stick to the fake ones.

&you're done! They're a little strange at first, but you should get used to them in a minute or two. If they still feel uncomfortable or even painful, remove them &reapply. After removing them for the day, clean the band &lashes with a bit of eye make-up remover - whatever you're using on the rest of your eye should be fine. Depending on how healthy your natural lashes are, it may be good to rub some petrolium jelly/Vaseline on them, as mascara &chemicals in other makeup can dry out your lashes, making them brittle &weak - I've never done this myself but I've heard it helps others.

Besides that, there's not much to it. Just be careful - a well-timed wink from one of these babies and you'll be the apple of any onlooker's eye. Use with caution, &be careful where you aim these things!

So some of you may know or have caught on that I'm currently attending (real!) college. An even smaller number of people will know that I am an English major (insert ubiquitous English major joke here), &thus have to read lots &lots &lots of essays, short stories, and novels; I'm currently required to read about 250-300 pages a week, &it's just going to get worse - whew! Even the things you love get tedious after too long, &while I adore reading, I find myself slumping through my homework, leaving hundreds of pages unread until mere hours before class. What do I do to keep my interest? Well, as many before me have, I relate it back to something I love: lolita.

A while back, Victoria Suzanne wrote this excellent post about viewing your lolita coordinates as an art form. It talks about making up a story to inspire your outfit. Well, I'm going to expand on this - taking someone else's writing as inspiration for your outfits.

I'll provide two examples,fittingly by Edgar Allan Poe, one of my favorite poets.

• Romance
• Annabel Lee

If you aren't familiar with these poems, I suggest you read them from the links provided - it's not really necessary to understand the post, but they're lovely, so you should do it anyway. No, I changed my mind - it is necessary; not as a lolita or a reader of my blog/this post, just as a person. Do it. Trust me.

(Poetry will change your life!!! Can you tell I'm an English major?)

So, when you're taking inspiration from anything - books, poems, music - there are three things to take note of: mood, symbolism, and themes. I figured Poe would be a good example to illustrate these, because he uses all three heavily. For the mood, take note of the type of language the creator (which I will henceforth refer to as "he," because my example is a male writer) uses, and for poetry, note the cadence: choppiness can denote anger, while flowing, beautiful words can denote romance, etc. Symbolism is easy - what hidden undercurrents does he use? What symbolism does he use to make his point? Poe compares Annabel Lee's eyes to stars, so I played off of that a little. Symbolism is something that is alluded to or mentioned only once; anything repeated often throughout the piece is a theme. A specific animal (Romance mentions birds fairly frequently), a location (the seaside in Annabel Lee), or any other number of things would count as a theme. A mood can also be a theme - the heavy, mourning air of Annabel Lee is a good example.


Now that you've narrowed down the mood, symbolism, and themes in the piece you want to emulate, look for other things, such as allusions to color or specific clothing items. If you can find that, you're straight - otherwise &more likely you'll have to do a bit more detective work. Use your symbolism or themes for this one - I added shells &seafoam green to the outfit I used for Annabel Lee because of the repeated theme of the ocean.

Romance

For Romance, I skipped any deep, philosophical interpretations and just went with my feelings and thoughts when I read this poem. I thought of nature, the woods, springtime,  and a childhood sweetheart the older, more logical narrator is trying to forget. I tried to find other interpretations of the poem, but the internet failed me, so this is all I have to go on. I wanted an almost childish, Alice Deco-type look for the girl I got the impression of, so I went with lighter spring colors and floral themes, like a child wandering away from a picnic to go pick wildflowers. If anyone else has another interpretation I'd love to hear/see it!

Annabel Lee

Not going to lie, Annabel Lee is my favorite poem of all time, evereverever. It was the first poem I read of Edgar Allan Poe's, and it's stuck with me strongly ever since. Again I wanted a childish air, since he flat out states that Annabel Lee was a child when she died. Pearls, seafoam green, and the sailor top all allude to the seaside kingdom in which the lovers lived, whereas the contrasting dark colors &veil imply mourning. The necklace has a cherub in it, referencing the angels ("not half so happy in heaven"). The stars are a a reference to the celestial symbolism in the last stanza of the poem.

We all get into our slumps- no one can avoid it, no matter how much you love x, y, or z. And whether it's your homework, your wardrobe, or your literary choices, I will always believe that beauty can help pull you out of it- whether that beauty is finding sartorial inspiration from a poem, imagining what the characters in that Nella Larsen novel are wearing, or doing your make-up as described in your Ancient Egyptian history homework a la Cleopatra. But don't think of inspiration as only something to rescue you when you're not your best - taking inspiration from the things you read, hear, or see is a great way to keep you connected to your environment &can be a great way to mesh your love of __________ with your love of lolita.
(Also, I might be starting a series called the Literary Lolita, relating the things I'm learning from my English classes back to lolita. It won't be a scheduled thing - just whenever I encounter something post-worthy. What do you guys think?)

Everything has its beauty, but not everyone sees it.
- Confucious

What is beauty? This is a question humanity has strived to answer probably since the invention of language. All those silly ancient geniuses - they didn't know what I know. For every person the definition of beauty is different - maybe beauty is making men want you, or being lovable or loved, or just being happy with yourself. What is beauty to you? Here's my opinion-

Beauty lies not in the body but in the heart &soul. This beauty we express with our bodies, but we can only do that by tapping into the beauty in our soul. A lolita spends hours getting dressed, coiffing, making-up, and then stands in front of the mirror and smiles. This happiness that is welling up from inside her - this is her soul set free and expressed in her body.

By today's standards, thinking like this probably makes me a "hippie." I have no problem with that - there are worse fates, worse labels society could have inflicted me with. Some of you will not like what I'm saying because of that - many people are made uncomfortable by talk of the soul these days. I don't understand it, but I don't have to. I don't live for them. It's for those of you who are smiling right now, who are reading and nodding and smiling in agreement - it's for you that I write (I speak, I document) for, not for those who are snickering and shaking their head in disbelief or even disgust.

Part of beauty, probably the most important part, is acceptance. Accept that your soul may not want you to look like other people's (or that maybe somedays it does - some days it may beg you to leave petticoats forlorn and comfort it in sweats or jeans or Uggs). I think that lolitas have gotten past this hurdle simply by being lolitas, by accepting that they love a sweet, frilly fashion that much of the outside world finds ridiculous.

We're used to not being accepted. We face it every day by the outside world - and occasionally in our own world, too. It is beautiful to accept that even the people you identify with may not understand or accept your beauty, whether these people are your family, your friends, or even our online lolita communities. It is beautiful to accept this with grace &dignity but to still express your beauty. However, it is important to respect yourself enough not to show this inner beauty to those who will not respect it. Sometimes it is more honorable to keep your beauty inside to protect it and yourself.

Beauty offends. Lolitas know this well. Offense is dangerous. While it is important that your body reflects your soul, protecting your mind &body are most important. An illustration of all these points would be the girl who posts to daily_lolita in a less than perfect outfit. She is trying to show the beauty in her soul, and she is calling that beauty lolita. It may not fit the rules we all follow, and many of us will tell her - not necessarily rudely (I'm not going to go into THAT here), but we will give her tips on how she can mold her internal aesthetic to fit this label more. She can choose to follow these rules or not - if she chooses to alter slightly her aesthetic and be approved of by the community (in which there is no fault), she will be accepted. If she does not, she doesn't need to expose herself to the community anymore. It's as simple as that - if you want to be accepted by certain people, cater to fit their ideas. If those ideas aren't something that sit well with you for whatever reason, distance yourself from those people and continue living as you feel you should. In this case, our "ita" can either conform to the rules of lolita and continue posting without complaint, or she can continue to dress as she wants but keep it to herself &for herself &not post it anywhere.

Though it hurts my Taurus (by which I mean my internal aesthetic &also my sense of justice &what is right or wrong) to admit this, sometimes internal beauty must be stifled for the health of the mind &body - but we must ask, what is the point of a healthy body if the soul ails? Therefore I leave the final decision up to you, as it often is circumstantial. Will you honor your mind, body, or soul? Is there a way to honor all three? Or, really, is there a difference between them?